Asteya: Don't Take What Isn't Yours

I remember vividly the moment I learned about stealing. I was four and grocery shopping with my mom. She was in the cereal aisle picking out our Coco Puffs and I was wandering nearby. A bin of candy caught my eyes, it was like Halloween, candy for the taking, so I did. I stuffed a handful of chocolates in my pocket, thinking nothing of it. When we got to the car I started to munch on my candy, enjoying the yumminess of it all when I got "the look" from my mom. She marched me back into the store and had me hand over the contraband to the store clerk. I was mortified. Lesson learned.

Stealing has its shades of grey. It can be anything from taking something from a store, a friend or stealing an idea or identity. No matter how little or insignificant the thing is, if it isn't yours and you don't have permission, it's stealing.

Asteya is one of the yamas, it means non-stealing. We know the obvious ones, but what about the not so obvious things that we steal. Like the shirt we borrowed from a friend and just never got around to giving back? You may not think much of it, but I guarantee every time your friend opens up her closet looking for that shirt she does.

Stealing, especially when it comes to identity, not as in identity theft, but in following another persons ways instead of being true to yourself, is subtle but can have its affects. It is important to be authentic. Be true to who you are, don't take your cues from someone else, following the cool crowd just to fit in. Talking how they talk, wearing what they wear. Instead find out who you are, not who you think people want you to be. It may not be the easy road, but in the end you will like yourself more.

Everyone has their guidelines on what they believe to be stealing. Those who were raised in a strict religious household feel guilt over any type of stealing, while others may not see an issue with taking something, like the extra pens at work. It's all about how you were raised and what your conscience believes. You can live firmly in your beliefs, as you choose your life and how you want to live, but you can't change others.

When you see someone stealing something it may rub you the wrong way, but it isn't up to you to tell that person that they are wrong, there are of course exceptions to this depending on the thing that is being stolen, more action may be appropriate. Confrontation on the small stuff can potentially lead to a fight. People may not care that they are stealing, but they certainly don't want to be called out on it. Instead lead by example. If it is an issue that keeps happening over and over again, try to find a nice way of pointing it out. Don't blame, but perhaps just question. Find out why the lady in your office keeps taking the pens, perhaps she doesn't think of it as stealing, perhaps she isn't paid enough and she thinks it is her right.

People like to watch and judge other people. If you are living in a way that sets an example that you are proud of you can go through your life happier as you have nothing to worry about. Your beliefs are solid. Some people will figure things out, others never will and you have to be ok with that. As much as you are willing to change, unfortunately not everyone is as pliable. Live with an open heart and an open mind. You'll be a lot happier. Karma will take care of the rest.